King of the Road

There are days when I swear I am going to kill myself driving.

I am the product of A-1 Driving School, where a driving instructor once told me "Bilis-bilisan mo naman ang driving mo. Baka yung tao sa likod mo nagagalit na sa'yo". I think I took that to heart.

I am also the product of watching and learning how to drive from countless FX and jeepney drivers. When I was starting out, my dad was too scared to let me behind the wheel. Thus, I learned by sitting next to FX and jeepney drivers and watching how they handled the road.

This means I know how drivers race with each other and how they get back at one another for a cut. I also am a professional at swerving in and out.

I am also the product of a friend back in 1st Year college, who was a psycho driver if anything.

The result is... me. Another slightly psycho driver on the road. And very "horn-y" at that.

Blockmates are surprised whenever I drive for them. All the pleasantness I harbor when dealing with people disappears when I'm behind the wheel. Suddenly, I am asshole extraordinaire. I relish the blast of the horn, the blinking of my high beams and all the speed a 1.6 engine can muster.

Put myself in a real situation today. I was scheduled to pick up some VHS tapes from RPN in Broadcast City. Alone.

While driving from Libis, a taxi cut in front of me really near that I had to slam on the brakes. Things like that get my blood boiling so I run after the taxi and cut in front of him.

The result was a very high speed race along Katipunan. I know, I know... stupid me. Very dangerous, daring and stupid.

My mom always tells me to let them be. But people like these really ought to have their teeth pulled out and then have a blade saw through their toothless gums... whoops! Too violent!

Another time, a bus dared me to hit him. The bus was doing counter-flow and wanted to get back to the right lane. I wouldn't let him pass but I had to give in in the end. But that episode had me shaking in anger that I couldn't even step on the clutch.

If it weren't for the fact that in the end, I was going to lose out, I really would be daring enough to let jeeps, buses and taxis hit me to have them be at fault.

I only take comfort in this nasty thought: I drive because I want to and not because I NEED to. I come off as very arrogant but it's the only way I can reign my anger in when driving.

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When I Come Around

The downside of living far away from your school is that there are days when your travel time is more than the amount of time you are needed at school.

Take for instance today: I got caught in the same nasty traffic that I was in yesterday. Right at the same time as well! All this while my groupmates are texting that stress-inducing "Wru?".

Dammit. I'm in traffic... and those texts don't help. They don't help my already-on-the-edge nerves and they don't help move the traffic any. And my group was going to present any minute.

I finally get to class, literally panting and sweating, and not exactly the best of times to be seen by my teacher. But what the heck, right?

And the presentation lasts for a mere 15 minutes, with me present in 10 of those minutes. And then it's all over. My purpose of going to school today is finished and I can only laugh at the circumstances.

Because I live pretty far from school (a 20 minute drive without traffic, an ordeal with traffic), I usually need 2 reasons to get me out of the house. But since this was an initial presentation for our video, that was worth 10 reasons. Yep, it was that important. And only 10 minutes long!!!!

And since I was late, I was marked absent. To think the reason I was late was because I was finishing the damned script which I had been working on the whole morning.

Talk about information paralysis. The topic is so broad that moving around the script and putting in analysis isn't the easiest job in the world. And that's exactly what I've been doing the whole morning-- script, script, script. Oh wonderful life I lead.

I was at breaking point some time in the morning, calling Joy who was already in school and giving her my best rendition of "Unwell" before hanging up.

I also called Silver Lining's house also to render them a song or 2 ("Unwell" and "Ain't Nothing Gonna Keep Me From You" by Teri de Sario). Yes my friends, that is how I deal with stress. I inflict myself on everyone else. Inflict being the operative word, and those who have heard my singing know why.

Working 7 hours on a measly script and rushing to school is rewarded by the teacher shooting down idea after idea presented in the script. Nice.

I happen to believe that our group came up with killer ideas that would have driven the point home. Sadly, old-fashioned teacher didn't see it that way. Sure, she may have another perspective on things but I feel that we could have made something better with our ideas. And I debated with our teacher for 5 minutes on that.

Sadly, no avail.

But there is a shining light at the end of the tunnel. By this time next week, all requirements (1 lengthy book review, one final exam and a video) would have been submitted.

Funny how fast the summer term's gone by, hey?

* * *

This is no "bato-bato sa langit" thing... I'm merely tossing thoughts up in the air...

Being a "best friend kinda guy" to a lot of girls, I am beginning to wonder what it's all about.

Is it being "always there" for her when she needs you? What if she demands too much of you? What if she suffocates you?

Things can't always be perfect, that I am sure of. At times, I like little skirmishes because you know that the friendship is real. But what if it becomes TOO real?

Real enough that you know you'll never be a couple. Real enough that your feelings toward that person come in cycles- there's a downside and there's an upside. But it's also nice that you can fight/talk it out and that you can be brutally honest about your feelings.

Then there are times when you just want to throttle her.

She can be a really good friend but she can also be extremely annoying. Annoying enough to tap into my nerves and get a rise out of me, a feat which very few have succeeded in doing. This results in me wanting to avoid her. Take note that this is something platonic.

Does me wanting to avoid/cut myself off from her make this friendship shallow? Or me shallow for that matter? Or does the fact that we're accepting of each other make things deeper? Ah ewan.

The things I clutter my mind with. I just had to let off steam.

* * *

Happy Birthday Habanapz!!!!!

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One Down...

Remember how I like to say that today is not my day? Well guess what, today wasn't my day either! haha!

I don't know how my "getting off the wrong side of the bed" began. Maybe it was the weird weather, maybe it was the fact that it was Monday, maybe it was because the characters of Maria la del Barrio are starting to get to me, maybe because I took vitamins...

One thing about vitamins: they have the opposite effect on me. Instead of making me "alive, alert, awake and enthusiastic", they sap my energy big time. And I took them because I was anticipating a long day today. True enough, it was a long day-- and I was dead tired through most of it!

I spent a big chunk of the morning reuniting with my beloved bean bag in front of the TV. And I was able to add to my slow-growing list of good Filipino movies! I caught that "critically-acclaimed" movie "Sana Pag-Ibig Na".

I'm skeptical about "critically-acclaimed" Filipino movies. I mean, your standard can't get very high considering what's available right? But this one was... okay.

Sure, the lead character couldn't act all that well and neither could Angel Aquino. But setting that aside, the story, the dialogue, the characters were all very real. And it didn't play up on the cheese factor. Okay, maybe just a little bit. But not much.

I was bumming in front of the TV very well aware that I had a report at 3. But I was complacent, I finished my part Friday to dedicate the weekend to the never-ending video script.

For all my complacency was worth, I almost didn't make it to class on time. Who would've thought that Ortigas would be in a state of gridlock at 2 in the afternoon???? I can't believe I spent an hour crawling from Valle Verde 6 to Meralco! To think I left the house at 12:45... which makes my travel time 2 hours and 15 minutes.

I get to class all sweaty, hot and harassed. Good thing there's another group reporting ahead, so I have time to get hold of my bearings. During my turn to report... ahh... well, I was fine I guess. But I believe I could've done better. All I can say is that I did enjoy poring over tabloids!

But that's done now. One presentation down, one more to go! Right now, I am in the midst of working on the script again for the initial presentation tomorrow. God, will this thing ever get done?

Other groups were saying that they'd be passing in some mediocre video, as long as they get the job done. But I refuse to do things that way-- minsan na nga lang ako makagawa ng video, ipakakaila ko pa sarili ko!

Right now, things are just so messy! And uncoordinated! And... and messy! The video project is my baby since I love production and post-production. Sadly, I'm not a good leader. Worker, yes. Leader, no. That's why I am starting to feel things are getting out of hand!

I am also worrying about a VCD. Before I left the house, I raided my mom's VCD collection for some period flicks my groupmates would be able to use. All this without telling my mom. And now if I'm not mistaken, I'm missing one. I'm not sure which but I really think I'm one VCD short.

This means it's time to bring on the heavy artillery: calling St. Anthony...?

Things weren't so bad really. I think it's the tiredness that's weighing me down. Note to self: never, EVER, take vitamins again. If you have to work, adrenaline will take care of that. If SARS gets to me, well... if it's my time so be it!

But during this hell week, oh please God, let at least one of these days be MY day?

* * *

Anyone know a decent (and cheap) video editing place? I'm at wit's end.

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First Friday Five

I've never taken one of these Friday Five thingies... until today. Let's see...

What drinking water do you prefer -- tap, bottle, purifier, etc.?

Honestly, if I had my way, I'd be guzzling water from the tap. It's easier to access and I drink A LOT. But since you can never be to sure about water these days, I like my water cold and from a purifier.

Speaking of which, I really find it annoying that all the water dispensers in school are missing. I think they're having them fixed or something, but talk about cruel! They took away the dispensers in the middle of summer! And now I'm spending an additional 50 bucks a day on bottled water! If this keeps up, I'm going to revert to my High School ways of brining a Coleman...

But I digress.

What are your favorite flavor of chips?

Barbecue or shrimp/prawn. Definitely barbecue and shrimp. But that former junk food thing "Snacku" which was made out of vegetables wasn't so bad really.

Of all the things you can cook, what dish do you like the most?

Haha! I... er... can't cook, sad to say. Though one of these days, I swear I am going to learn how. I love to eat so I guess I oughta learn how to cook even just the basics. Like rice.

It's for survival as well. And I happen to believe that a guy cooking earns a few additional "pogi points"!

How do you have your eggs?

Any old way. Scrambled, hard-boiled, sunny side up, omelette... I'm not particular.

Ever since I read it in Archie, I've been curious: What's a poached egg? I may want to try that as well!

Who was the last person who cooked you a meal? How did it turn out?

That would have to be the helper, for dinner. It was one of my favorites (I have a million favorites), Korean Beef Ribs.

It was great... just the way I like it. The recipe was off the shelf from some supermarket and it was a real lucky find. There was just something wrong with it... the ribs were too ribby. And they were from some poor, thin cow. So I spent most of the meal scraping the meat off the ribs.

* * *

The weekend's over, unfortunately. Ever heard a summer hell week? I think the next 2 weeks are going to be just about that.

At least I was able to spend the day with the family. Something I haven't done in awhile since my weekends have been pretty full. I am now in search of a nice sit-up bench and a set of dumbells since my schedule absolutely refuses to allow a even a little time for the gym. Thus, I am determined to get fit at home. Hey, at least there are no closing hours to worry about.

A visit to Toby's Sports and Hobbies got me head over heels in love with this sit-up bench that can be put into an upright position as well so that it can be used for leg-lifts, flyes and other exercises. It's very beautiful, and also very pricey.

It looks like a good investment. It's something I'm going to use for long, it doesn't need additonal maintenance, it doesn't need updating/cleaning/repairing and I'm going to get my exercise. One thing left to do: save, save, save.

* * *

Had mass in a sweatbox of a church. The St. Francis church across the street from Shangri-La plaza is sweltering.

By homily, the front of my shirt was almost forming one of those inverted sweat triangles. I don't understand it- the Church has high ceilings, tall windows and electric fans. And here I am (as well as everybody else) perspiring as if they came from a 1 kilometer run. There is simply no air.

I am also amused at the SARS prevention measures that Churches are taking. I just realized that nobody holds hands during the "Our Father" anymore. And right before Communion, the overhead projector flashed a "SARS Precautionary Measures" announcement which askes churchgoers to refrain from receiving Communion by way of mouth.

I am spoiled by our village chapel where everyone still holds hands and takes Communion by the mouth. Although if my memory serves me right, I was initially taught to take Communion by the hands. It takes awhile getting used to the "left over right" Communion pose all over again.

Oh, and get this: there is a SARS prayer right after Communion. Ho boy, that takes the cake. But then again, I guess prayer is a more powerful remedy against the disease if anything.

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