Wasted

Can't believe I spent my entire day on "low-batt" mode. The effects of my 1 hour sleep between Thursday and Friday have began to materialize today.

People generally know me as an Energizer bunny because of my constant state of hyperactivity. Well friends, today, the Energizer Bunny has lost steam and is out to lunch.

My mind was really, really slow and I was staring into space most of the time. I was also a bit cranky and could hardly muster enough energy to socialize with my Comm blockmates.

What was annoying was that I woke up really early to make it to my 7:30 class only to find out that it was a free-cut.

Don't get me wrong- I live for free-cuts! But don't give me one when I gave up an extra hour of much needed sleep to make it to class on time.

For the rest of the time, I kept on zonking out all over the place.

I had a beautiful nap during the 15 minute break of Principles of Marketing. Normally, I'd run around class socializing with anyone. Today, I slept.

I slept through my blockmates playing American football in the classroom. I slept through loud music from a laptop. I slept through my blockmates throwing chips at me to wake me up!

I was also extremely sleepy after class and didn't do very well in the officers meeting after class. In fact, I got into a little skirmish with Li since I'm not a fan of her leadership style and I was feeling really cranky.

Driving home, I was even out of it. Didn't speed and drove like an old lady since there was no telling the extent of my fatigue.

I'm even nodding off as I type this now.

I was told today that my Principles of Marketing group needed to meet on another case study to be presented next Saturday.

Apparently, I am still eons away from the end of hell week.

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Index card used for the impromptu speech. I'm proud of it!

Rock Around the Clock

I have reached the pinnacle of the midterms hell week within the past 24 hours.

It was Murphy's Law going on full force and then some. That was how bad it was- pure, unadulterated and unrelenting stress.

Just got home right now from the whole barrage of activity that I've been entagled in since last night and I am undoubtedly tired. I am exhausted and very drained.

This is how it went:

20:00,Thursday. Habanapz and I as well as some friends watch "'Tol, Bili Ka ng Ticket", a play put up by our org, the ROC.
The play is fine, albeit the real drama of the story is lost in the execution and the interpretation by the audience.

21:30. Meet up with Lianne in Starbucks across school to finish up a report due for 7.30 the next day. This is cramming to the hilt since, in our busy-ness, we neglect to research on this APS-Japan group report.
There are 3 of us in the group. The last member decides to meet up with us after an endless barrage of text messages and calls. We are to learn later that his presence was nothing but a hindrance to us.

23:00. We are still working. Lianne is in a quandary as her laptop's Drive A is in her brother's apartment in UST. 3rd member is being a pest in his unrproductivity. I am happily typing away.

00:00, Friday. Report is far from finished. Li and I decide to drive to UST to get the Drive A. We all agree to go home and type. It is agreed that all parts be sent to me by 3 A.M. so I can make a powerpoint presentation.
At this point, Li and I are already fuming at the inefficiency of 3rd member. Li is in tears. This is in addition to the anxiety of the anticipated Comm impromptu speeches.
In the car, to keep Li from snapping, we tune in to 96.3 and just sing to our hearts content. The situation is so bad that we just have to laugh our blues away. We do make it to UST.

01:00. We are friggin' lost. I remember getting out into Gen. Lacson. I remember seeing the Dangwa Station. Next thing I know, it's North Cemetery. And then I don't know where we're headed.
It can't get any worse than this. The report is still incomplete and we are stuck in a strange place in the middle of the night.

01:40. Finally get out into EDSA. We are apparently in Balintawak and we have no idea how we got there. Landmark is SM North Edsa.

2:00. I get home and hit the sack immediately. There is still so much work ahead and I can't allow myself the luxury of sleep.

3:00. I'm alive, alert, enthusiastic.. and panicking. 3rd group member hasn't mailed me anything so I have to make do with whatever I have: A report on Samurai culture and Seppuku

6:00. I have the report on diskette. I am also ready to head for school in my polo, necktie and dress slacks
I was in a silver-gray, shiny polo and black silk necktie in line with Habanapz's idea that even if I'm not able to say anything during the speech, then at least I looked hella good.

7:00. Am in school and very hyperactive from lack of sleep. Li is not and neither is 3rd group member. I am slowly panicking.

7:40. We go into class and the teacher is already there. The computer projector is not working and 3rd group member is nowhere to be found.
The report does pull off pretty well, albeit a lot of lacking details, no thanks to 3rd group member who hasn't shown up.

10:20. I pull off my impromptu speech with the topic "The "H" in Bhen". I was called 2nd and that was a pretty good spot to be in. My speech had a lot of ideas that I believe lacked organization, but I got good reviews.
I am hoping I did fine...
Bambi asks me to accompany her after her 2:30 class so going home or to the gym is impossible.

13:30. Have lunch and griping session with Li. We are seething over 3rd group member.

16:30. Habanapz, Bambi, Van and I watch "Catch Me If You Can" in Galleria. They say the movie was good. I don't know- I slept through the whole thing because of fatigue.

19:00. Leira's party in Congo Grille El Pueblo starts. We are not there as Ryan is singing in the school's Acoustic Concert. We don't end up making it to Leira's anyway.

21:00. Ryan is finally on stage and Leira and Butz's dinner is finished.

22:00. Dinner across school. Bambi and I later deliver flowers to Leira's condo.

Let's hope I don't get into anymore "Mentos Moments" and "Murphy Situations" like this again.

My body is crying out for rest, and there are readings and class for tomorrow.

Life is kind. Very kind. God, I'm sabog.

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Late-Bloomer

Dig this: I am now an official Lord of the Rings convert. Yeah, it's been showing for 3 weeks now and I haven't even seen the first one, but I am now yet another LOTR fan!

It's funny because LOTR never really interested me and I had absolutely no intention of seeing it whatsoever.

It was just that my friend Kenneth was looking for someone to watch with him, and I happened to be one of the rarities who haven't seen the movie yet.

I meet him after class with the hope of convincing him that other movies would be better. I mean, at this time, there is "Hot Chick", "One Hour Photo", "Catch Me If You Can" and "Sukdulan" (haha! the last one was a joke!).

Unfortunately, Kenneth was adamant. He'd been looking forward to watching since he was in Singapore last year. There was no convincing him out of it and he didn't care that I didn't watch "The Fellowship".

So over lunch, Kenneth gave me an abbreviated summary of number 1. Aside from this, he annotated the movie while ti was going on. And surprise, surprise! I loved the movie.

The Two Towers was just like one of the many slam-bang suspense flicks which I am a very big fan of. Throw in an element of fantasy and I'm hooked!

Of course, part of what really made the movie was Kenneth and his practically patented brand of wry humor. It's the same humor I have and he is also one of the very few people who is really able to appreciate my humor. Thus, it was a blast heckling and making comments throughout the movie.

Now the only problem is that... I am now one of the many legions awaiting the coming of the last installment of the series! What a tragedy!

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Emotional Baggage

T --

Remember that promise of becoming "the best of friends, no matter what would happen"? Remember how we promised nothing would change after the s*^t hit the fan? I just got to thinking- whatever became of that promise?

But then again, I've learned to stop expecting from you. I've learned to stop hoping. I've learned to stop depending on you.

So what difference does it make that you've decided to make a re-entrance into my life and made me hope that things are going to be fine? This isn't the first time I'm going to be disappointed. By this time I should be used to it.

Give me your reasons if you must. Give me your excuses. Tell me about your life now. Frankly, I don't even know if I care anymore.

One of these days, when you decide to make another one of your periodic returns into my life, you'd better check because there might be no one to welcome you back the next time you come around.

-- B

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Estudyante Blues

*I can't believe I sat through the teeny-bopper 80's flick, which carries the name of this post's title!

Know the feeling of studying and knowing so much and then taking the test and not knowing squat?

That's exactly what I felt awhile ago while taking my APS-Japan midterms. I studied like anything for 2 days and suddenly, I can't even answer half of the True or False part of the test! I really hate these objective tests!

I was able to regain some ground in the essay portion (my specialty since I can get "creative") but I don't think I can score enough points to make this test pass. Ah well, at least I know now what to expect.

And after nefarious tests like that, it seems that you just have to find something to make you laugh. Because if you don't you are gonna go stark raving mad with frustration.

I also caught the impromptu speeches of Habanapz and her block.

The impromptu speeches are legendary in Comm. You have to stand in front of the class and talk about an out-of-this-world topic for 5 minutes. Before this, you are given only 5 minutes to prepare.

When I say out-of-this-world, I'm talking about topics as bizaare as "CTRL + ALT + DELETE", "Washington Apples" and even "If I were to go". Things like that. Habanapz was cool- she held her ground.

The scary thing is that I'm due for this on Friday. Thing about me is that I can have any topic and talk about if for ages. Unfortunately, when nervousness hits you, I literally suffer a mental block. This has been my problem even when acting and I am wont to adlib.

My greatest fear is being in front of everyone, not knowing what to say and looking like a complete moron.

While the speeches were going on, I snuck out of class to meet up with my Theology teacher (a priest) for an "academic chat" which he holds with each of his students.

I felt a bit guilty being in front of him actually. See, I read my book but I never listen to him. During class, I usually clown around or doodle or what have you. And since I was a teacher for 2 summers, being up in front of the class allows you to see everything.

Thus, I'm pretty sure he sees me slacking off in class and he just doesn't call my attention. And awhile ago, he was going over my cuts (2) and my quiz scores which were not all that up to scratch.

But I think I practically shrivelled when he asked me "When was the last time you went to confession?"

I could hardly tell him "5 years, Father". I mean, how do you tell a priest that you're not exactly a fan of confession? Or that I'm a bit of a renegade Catholic?

In the end, I asked him for Spiritual Direction. I'm not exactly gung ho on the idea, but I'm pretty sure I need it.

I mean, I do believe that there is God. But the foundations of my faith are rather shaky and I have found myself questioning it more than once.

Perhaps Spiritual Direction will give me some of the answers I've been searching for, not only with my faith but with life in general.

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[N o T i t l e]

Just can't think of any right now, in my state of "stressed-ness". But boy, did I miss blogging.

Had a lot of laughs over dinner tonight with the family. I think it all started when my mom brought home a copy if Inquirer Libre. One of the articles was the booboos committed by contestants in Go Bingo.

Arnel Ignacio: Sa anong bansa makikita ang mga Hindu?
Contestant: Hindunesia!

AI: Ano ang nasa gitna ng donut?
C: Palaman!

AI: Ano ang ginagamit ng mga eskimo sa halikan?
C: Dila!

AI: Hindi ito boob, hindi ito tube, pero tinatawag ng iba na boob tube. Ano ito?
C: Bra!

Had me laughing there. I guess I've been needing it since so many things have been starting to pile up!

I am having midterms due tomorrow for APS-Japan, I've got an aticle due, more homework for the rest of the week and to top it all off, a wisdom tooth has started growing.

On APS-Japan, I am exepriencing major information overload. I mean, I've been studying since yesterday (streaks of nerdiness) but I'm still having a hard time segregating terms like Ashikaga, Kamakura, Sengoku and what have you!

I've been reading and reading. Since I have a basic idea of how the test is gonna be, I've also been memorizing! And now things are getting jumbled in my head! Argh!

* * *

Sunday, I camped in front of the TV watching the closing ceremonies of the 4th World Meeting of Families. Can't help but feeling depressed by the whole thing.

Not that it was ugly or anything. Nope- on the contrary, it was grandiose. Unfortunately, the reception for it has been lukewarm in the least. I can't help but compare it to the World Youth Day of 1995 when the Pope came. Now those were memorable times.

I still remember waiting for 4 hours along Roxas Boulevard to catch a single glimpse of the pope. And I did! And I don't know if it was only me, but he was around 10 meters away enclosed in the pope mobile, but you could feel the peace emanating from him.

All in the chaos of people wanting to see him, you could still feel his peace.

I also remember checking into a hotel during the vigil but lingering along Quirino Grandstand to join the hoardes of people there.

The atmosphere was very alive and festive. The park was alive at 2 in the morning. Throngs of people were just mingling and even more were arriving. In fact, the next day, we hardly could get out of the hotel.

But that was one very different and very memorable experience.

Can't help thinking how special the World Meeting of Families would have been had the Pope been fit to make an appearance.

Really, promotions were active. And I liked the "Only Selfless Love" song. And the preparations were all set.

Unfortunately, it can't be denied that the Pope is indeed the star of the show. Without him, people wouldn't bother. Hence, the lackluster showing at the congress.

The anemic showing of the World Meeting of Families was also reflected in the government' lack of enthusiasm. Gloria wasn't at the final mass. Officials hardly took it as an opportunity to showboat or have PR mileage.

The only good thing about it was that a papal blessing was administered and all venial sins were forgiven.

For someone who hasn't gone to confession in 5 years, that was one helluva bonus!

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